(by Cathal Kelly, thestar.com)
They’re still leading the Stanley Cup two games to one, but since this is Vancouver, the whole city is already in therapy.
And also because it’s Vancouver, everybody’s decided that tossing a rod over one blowout loss isn’t just explainable, it’s, like, a really healthy thing to do.
“It’s really good for our mental health to commiserate in the loss. Everyone’s kind of griping,” clinical psychologist Joti Samra told the Vancouver Sun. “It brings people together and they’re more likely to start a conversation with a stranger.”
Well, it’s not really a conversation per se. It’s more like a long, steady moan that slowly morphs into heaving sobs and eventually ends up with the pair of you all wet and snotty and clawing at each other screaming, “Why? WHYYYY?!!!”
Because you got outmuscled and outhustled. That’s why. Smarten up and try again tonight.
Odds against Canucks?
If they really want to send themselves into a tailspin they can reflect on this statistical horrorshow dug up by the Star’s Dan Robson — there have been 41 beatings of five goals or more in Stanley Cup finals history. Only five teams on the receiving end of one of those have gone on to win the series.
Uh oh, bring the crash cart. Bring a whole lot of them.
NHL gets it right?
There was an unusual feeling going around NHL HQ yesterday — pride in a job well done.
The league and its interim discipline czar, Mike Murphy, were roundly praised for the decision to suspend Aaron Rome for four games (i.e. the rest of the finals) for his late, off-his-feet hit on Nathan Horton, who has suffered a severe concussion.
In a survey from the Boston Globe, 53 per cent of Bruins fans agreed with the decision, which marks the first time in recorded history that a majority of Bostonians agreed with anything that comes out of New York.
Even the dissenters in Vancouver couldn’t find the energy to kick too much.
Plus, it’s Aaron Rome. Do you think their reaction might’ve been different if it was Ryan Kesler out of the series for knocking, say, Shawn Thornton’s head off? Yeah, me too.
So everybody’s relatively happy, considering.
Well, Colin Campbell’s not happy. Colin Campbell’s getting a complex. Send Joti Samra to the former suspender-in-chief’s house to talk to him about healthy commiseration and conversations with strangers.
Send a real doctor, too. And lots of bandages.
Why are we still playing hockey in the summer again?
It will be 31 C in Boston today ahead of Game 4.
They don’t play beach volleyball in Vladivostok in February. Why does hockey insist on dragging a winter sport into the middle of summer? It’s confusing for everyone.
How big are the Canucks in the Lower Mainland right now? People are lining up to name their children after them.
At least, that’s what this says.
The proof? Last year, five people named their kids Kesler and 26 others named their newborn Linden. Cited as proof but not really proof is the fact that 91 people named their kid Daniel and 106 new parents chose Mason.
Is that supposed to impress us?
If the Toronto Maple Leafs made the second round of the playoffs, people across this city would be naming newborn girls Bozak and Lebda. Boys? Lupul is a strong name. A masculine name. Next visit after the maternity ward? The tattoo parlour, to a bust of Ron Wilson on their chests.
If Vancouver thinks it’s winning any awards for psychotic hockey-related life decisions, they have to know that Toronto is one playoff appearance from having a total meltdown. Surprisingly, psychiatric professionals are not standing by. They know just how much this team needs, too.
To read at source, click here.